Mystory IV & V

Decision Scene:

A sailboat is an image that comes to mind when I think about my decision making. Something as simple as choosing what color shirt to wear for me involves me constantly changing my mind, just as a sailboat is constantly being changed by the wind. One underlying reason I think I do this is because I sometimes am weary of a potential outcome of a choice, so while at first I thought the choice would produce a good outcome I quickly realized that maybe it won’t so I changed my decision and thusly changed my direction. I try to stay committed to things, but if I think it will not turn out for my benefit then I may quickly abandon the idea.

Memory Glimpse:

As far back as I can remember is an experience I had one day at lunch when I was in elementary school. Kids began throwing their trays away and preparing to make their way to the playground. I don’t know why but that day I decided to bring three quarters to school with me, and after lunch buy three Hostess Ding Dongs for me and two of my friends. Why I decided to do this, I may never figure out the true reasoning. I walked over to the table and handed the lady three quarters, and she handed me three Ding Dongs. I was smiling ear to ear, so happy to give my friends a treat for lunch. I looked around the lunch room and I didn’t see them anywhere, checked the playground still no sign of them. Finally I asked some other kids, and eventually figured out that there weren’t at school today. Once I figured that out, I was devastated. I had three Ding Dongs and no one to share them with. From my best recollection, I can remember finding a bench, and sitting alone and eating the three Ding Dongs. I wasn’t happy at all that I got more food, I was sad because I had all this food and no one to share it with.

Micro Scenes:

As I have grown older I have experienced many awkward moments, but looking back I can recall my first true awkward moment. I was in the fourth grade; I can remember the cool morning and my father walking me to class. The strange thing about this was that my Dad never walked me to class; I was always dropped off at the front of the school and just walked to class myself. At the beginning of the year I was enrolled in Mr. Hills class, and for some odd reason which I still do not know today my mother did not like that man. I thought he was a nice guy and a good teacher, but apparently she didn’t agree with me. Eventually she forced me to switch classes. In hindsight it wasn’t really a big deal, the classrooms were even connected. At the time though I thought it was life changing. I didn’t know anyone in the other class, or the teacher, I was petrified and embarrassed to go to school. That is why my Dad walked me to class that day. I walked into the classroom that morning, literally almost hiding behind the teacher’s leg. She said “Class this is Casey Love, he is the new student.” At that moment everyone was looking at me, they seemed nice but I didn’t know any of them. Would they like me, dislike me I didn’t know. The worst part about that moment was the mystery. I just stood there in silence not knowing what to do. It was just complete silence for a few seconds. At that very instance is when I had my first awkward moment. Was it a good memory, not really. Would I ever forget it, there’s no way I possibly could.